2 posts tagged “crossing arms”

    There are times when we close up ourselves during conversation. At that moment our body language signaling some kind of discomfort putting some blockage between us and the other person.

     There are few reasons for using closed gestures in conversation:

When person feels some kind of threat and mistrust in other person this can be as a defensive form. 

     Hiding somethig physical or emotional can make person to use closed gestures. This can be anything from dislike and lying to simply hiding stain on the blouse. 

     Using closed gestures might be just kind of habit. If person feels comfortable and relaxed while crossing legs (especially when sitting) or arms this not obviously signals something bad. To present ourselves more friendly though it's better use more open gestures that are still comfortable.

     Yet another time when we might close up is when we are cold. 

    So what are the closing gestures?

    The most frequently used are crossing arms and/or legs

    Crossing arms. This can be done in few ways involving just one or both hands, but the meaning is the same - to cross the central line of the body. So holding one hand with the other, folding them or tightly close, crossing with wrists or holding tightly the body (like hugging oneself) as well as resting a hand on the table can be considered as closed gestures. The level of tension in shoulders and arms can help in revealing whether person is hiding something or is just relaxed in this position.

     Crossing legs. There are few ways to cross the legs like ankle or knee cross as well as putting ankle on the opposite leg's knee, a tense wrap-around and resting crossed legs on some object like stool or chair. A special attention needed when a person has crossed legs,but open arms. This can be a deliberate attempt to look comfortable and relaxed. This especially applies when the legs are hidden under the table or behind the counter etc.

      As to feet, they may point to the exit.

      A person might also look away or down, in other words escaping eye contact.

     Some tricks can be done to make a person more open.

     You may give a person something to hold and thus open their arms. You may ask them to help you in something etc. Another powerful way is mirroring. You should take the same position as they have. Keep doing this for a while until you create a bond with that person and they would feel more attracted to you. Then slowly open up yourself using appropriate gestures. If person bonded enough they would open up as well. This should be done slowly though. Let say starting with hands to show something or just supporting your talk. If they are still closed, then return to closed position again and gradualy build their trust in you and then try again.

  For more body language tips and tricks,please visit my site Improving Communication in Business and Personal Life

      Arms are appendages that can freely move. With the help of arms we are able to accomplish so many things I bother mentioning here. Arms take part in a language of deaf-and-dumb. They are extremely useful parts of the body and can be helpful in decoding body language.     

     By the way, when you suspect somebody in deceit pay attention for arms kept still. Usually that is the first place the liar starts to control theirselves. They can hold one arm with another to make them both still.

     Our arms are extremely helpful in supporting real talk. People articulate their words, emphasizing their meaning. It really help bonding with a small child and eases communication process with them.

     We can observe what kind of person is the speaker as they wave their hands during talk. When somebody is excited or confident they tend to wave more frequently and in bigger amplitude. Less confident people use less waving space and it's close to the body. 

     Arms can show friendly and threatenning gestures as well as actions. Saying that, slow moves often with curved arms show friendliness or comfort, whereas quick direct moves toward target considered as threat. Arms can be used both as  weapon and defensive tools. Martial arts are another way of nonverbal communication. 

Crossing arms has so many meanings. Generally speaking they can serve as a doorway to the person. So crossing them make a block between person and the outer world. That can be done to block attack or hide something within the person inner self. 

Crossed arms show a straight signal and can make others feel rejected, so they may send the according respond like disagreeing.

Crossed arms may mean inner discomfort or vulnerability of the person or lack of trust in other person.

 The extent of the crossing shows how firmly the person is closed. If crossing arms is supported with crossed legs as well than it's a big cut out.

   Croosed arms is not always a negative sign. People may cross arms when they are cold. Sometimes we fold arms using it as a relaxing position.

    To break crossed-arm position a person can give the other person something to hold.

So,defined crossed arms as defensive position, we can say that noncrossed arm position (usualy held still across the body) means confidence and trust. This may also indicate power.

More specific on parts of arms in future posts.

Improving Communication in Business and Personal Life

source:www.changingminds.org