37 posts tagged “body language”

     Our life is all about communication. This include family members, neighbours, friends, work collegues, boss, well just any person we come across with. Quite often we can understand what's occuping person's mind without them saying anything. Their posture, gesture and especially facial expressions can change rapidly trying to follow thoughts and emotions connected with these thoughts.

     I came across this short cartoon and want to share it with you.

How do you like it?

For information on body language, please visit Improving Communication in Business and Personal Life

     Babies have innate ability to communicate through body language. They are programmed to understand nonverbal signals that adults send them. Words would have some meaning and understanding at much later stage and it's just near second birthday when they start use simple sentences to communicate their needs.

     Newborns can see just about 20-30 cm away, but right from the start can recognise human face. They are attracted to human face much more than to anything else. And it is very important to keep babies on hands at such distance so they can see the face. As babysitter expert Lisa pointed in one of her recent posts it is important to talk to babies even if they can't understand words just yet. By trying to get into baby level parents would also smile, do funny faces, rock, sing etc. A lot of body touching is involved massaging, tickling, cuddling, kissing etc.

     One of the first body language expressions that babies master is smiling. They use a lot of nonverbal signals to show their feelings and needs. For example waving arms and kicking to show their happiness, turning away when they don't want something (like food), banging on something or throwing things to get attention, pointing or taking parent's hand to lead to desirable thing and much much more.

     Babies learn body language by observing and imitating adults. It can be to such great level that sometimes parents see themselves in those small bodies. So it's important for parents to watch what signals they send through out the day.

     Body language help babies in learning new skills and parents should encourage this. Singing, clapping, stamping, dancing, laughing are just few examples.

     Very often, especially with smaller babies parents use body gestures to demonstrate what baby should do. For example when they try to feed baby they might also open and close their mouth and even do swallowing movements or putting two hands together to one of the ears to show it's time to sleep etc. 

    Babies are best in reading and decoding body language. They understand the mood and emotions of adults from little cues. A wag of the finger, a stern look, shake of the head, nodding, smiling, outstretched arms ready for hugs etc.

     Babies are also the best in manipulating parents. They know  when and how to press the "button" to get what they want. How it comes we have to learn a lot of skills, like influence and persuasion, again once grown up?

For more information on body language visit Improving Communication in Business and Personal Life 

When person feels under attack or somebody is threatening it's good to have a try of speaking calmly to get the reason for their behavior. And use positive body language. Sometimes this may help at other time not.

 It depends on the character of the person. Some people become aggressive as well and stand to defend themselves or the other person. They may try to defend themselves using hands, legs or some things they may find on their way -pens, chairs, tables. In the moment of attack and thus in need to defend themselves usually automatic defensive gestures come out. People tend to cover vital organs without thinking of that.

Others would use submissive body language like avoid looking at the offender and try to make their body look smaller by putting head down and crouching into lower position. They may also stand still without movement, so as not to pay attention on themselves. In order to find a way out they might also look from side to side and ask for help.

Such situations are really unpleasant especially if you don't feel anything behind you to bring such a situation.

It is really difficult to suggest something as every situation is different. It depends on how big and strong a person who attacks is, what and if they have a weapon, if they are under influence of some drugs or alcohol , are they alone or with a group of supporters and so on and if the defender knows at least some simple defensive gestures etc.

I'd like you all to involve as I want to hear your opinion. What actions person should use once under the threat? Bring your ideas and experiences, please.

On more body language information, please visit Improving Communication in Business and Personal Life

    It's good to know signs of aggression that other person's body language can signaling you. And it's not funny (for a normal person) to be involved in a fight particularly when it's possible to escape one. Besides in modern society fights are not socially acceptable. Usually the cause for some fights, verbal and physical, is that some aggressive words and body language gestures are used. This is done either to show authority or to offence somebody.

    So, how the actual threat may look like?

    In facial expression this is usually long gaze with widely opened eyes, which might be supported with lowering the head,so the look would be from under the brows. The brows might be pulled together to show off the anger. Another cues are pursed lips and a frown. Plus redness of the face may add up on anger.

    Some other visible signals that show the readiness to attack is exposing and lowering the body to look brave and stable. Sometimes a person might clench their fists.

    Another form of aggression can be invasion of personal space of the person. That is entering their comfort zone that ment to be for close people like friends, members of family etc. This can happen when somebody wants to show friendliness either false or too early. The closer person gets to the other person the greater invasion.

    Another form of entering comfort zone is touching the person. Even such forms that are accepted in society can be taken as aggressive. For example touching the shoulder, arm or back. Actually these are considered gestures of authority.

    There are many gestures that one can use to offence the other person and thus provoke some uncontrolled actions. The most common ones are rude finger and arm body languages as well as some body gestures, chin tilts.

   Sometimes people use gestures "in the air", just showing off what can be done or preparing for a real attack or making  a test for the other person's reaction.

   Usually the more gestures are involved and their usage of the air space, the more angry or agressive person is.

   Sometimes people use some things to show their aggressive mood. That might be flying plates, banging the table with fists or loudly closing the door etc.

  Need more tips on body language? Visit Improving Communication in Business and Personal Life

     How often do you notice if the person is interested in conversation? Do they look at your eyes and keep the talk alive by adding their bit.

     Sometimes the conversation doesn't go the flow we want. If the person is not interested in what you are saying it's difficult especially when you are trying to make a sale. They won't buy unless you want to bore them to open their wallet. Some sales people use this way of persuading for purchase. It's really annoing.

    Maybe it's just better to leave the talk for another time. What if person is just tired and all that's occupies their mind is just to have some rest? Talking later about the same issue might bring better results. Or what if person is not interested at all...then why should you waist their and your time. If you still want  to persist then changing an  approach might make sense.

    What are the signs of bored body language? Some of them are very obvious...

    Eye contact, actually its absence is one of the main signals of boredom in non verbal communication. A person would look anywhere but your eyes. It would look like everything around is pretty much intertaining like door, their watch or clock on a wall, other people, they might be deciding whether they need manicure done etc. 

    They may also tap their fingers or swing their feet showing off their unpatience and readiness to switch their mind for something else.

    Their body may sag and they'd look for something to suppost them like leaning against the wall or slouch down in the seat etc. They may also yawn quite often (openly or trying to control).

    They would probably use some closed body language gestures as well. You can read my previous post for those.

Want to know more on body language? Then visit Improving Communication in Business and Personal Life

    There are times when we close up ourselves during conversation. At that moment our body language signaling some kind of discomfort putting some blockage between us and the other person.

     There are few reasons for using closed gestures in conversation:

When person feels some kind of threat and mistrust in other person this can be as a defensive form. 

     Hiding somethig physical or emotional can make person to use closed gestures. This can be anything from dislike and lying to simply hiding stain on the blouse. 

     Using closed gestures might be just kind of habit. If person feels comfortable and relaxed while crossing legs (especially when sitting) or arms this not obviously signals something bad. To present ourselves more friendly though it's better use more open gestures that are still comfortable.

     Yet another time when we might close up is when we are cold. 

    So what are the closing gestures?

    The most frequently used are crossing arms and/or legs

    Crossing arms. This can be done in few ways involving just one or both hands, but the meaning is the same - to cross the central line of the body. So holding one hand with the other, folding them or tightly close, crossing with wrists or holding tightly the body (like hugging oneself) as well as resting a hand on the table can be considered as closed gestures. The level of tension in shoulders and arms can help in revealing whether person is hiding something or is just relaxed in this position.

     Crossing legs. There are few ways to cross the legs like ankle or knee cross as well as putting ankle on the opposite leg's knee, a tense wrap-around and resting crossed legs on some object like stool or chair. A special attention needed when a person has crossed legs,but open arms. This can be a deliberate attempt to look comfortable and relaxed. This especially applies when the legs are hidden under the table or behind the counter etc.

      As to feet, they may point to the exit.

      A person might also look away or down, in other words escaping eye contact.

     Some tricks can be done to make a person more open.

     You may give a person something to hold and thus open their arms. You may ask them to help you in something etc. Another powerful way is mirroring. You should take the same position as they have. Keep doing this for a while until you create a bond with that person and they would feel more attracted to you. Then slowly open up yourself using appropriate gestures. If person bonded enough they would open up as well. This should be done slowly though. Let say starting with hands to show something or just supporting your talk. If they are still closed, then return to closed position again and gradualy build their trust in you and then try again.

  For more body language tips and tricks,please visit my site Improving Communication in Business and Personal Life

    What are open body language gestures? What do they mean? 

    People use open gestures when they feel relaxed and secure, when they trust the person they are talking with and agree with what's being said.

    The start of the whole idea of openness is in no way having crossed legs or arms. Even if we cross our legs or arms or worth still both just because we feel relaxed in that position it sends the signal of being closed. Thus the other person could feel less open as well. 

    Another thing to remeber that during talk person can change position from closed to opened. Attentive observer can notice those swifts and thus see changes in thinking and feelings.

    Open arm gestures involve free moving mostly synchronical. Arms take a big part in supporting what the person is saying. Palms are the most expressive in this case by "forming" detailed shapes and "holding" things. In open gestures arms are usually held wide open with palms mostly up. This shows that the person has nothing to hide and is trustworthy.

     Open legs means not crossed. In most cases that is keeping them parallel or slighty stretched apart.

     I was mentioning in one of my previous posts that legs, especially feets can be subtle pointers to show what or who person prefers. If feet are pointing at the other person during conversation this is probably a sign that they like them and enjoy the talk. Some other gestures should show the interest.

     Sometimes you may see a mixed message like arms are opened and legs are crossed. This simply can mean that the person is feeling comfortable in this position. Another meaning though could be that they try to control their body expressions. So you need to be careful. Other gestures should suppost or dispel your suspition.

    Open gestures occur when the person is interested in the talk and is actively involved in it. So usually this means a head directed solely towards the other person and a prolonged eye contact.

    In overall person feels relaxed and at ease and sometimes you may also notice that person tries to loosen their clothes as well (like unbuttoning or even removing jacket or coat etc).

  More tips on body language you can find on my site .

 Please visit Improving Communication In Business, at Work and Personal Life

Hi everyone

Please visit my site Improving Communication In Business and Personal Life to read my new article on body language.  It's called 'Interpreting Personal Space In Nonverbal Communication'. It's under NEW ARTICLE section.

Lena

      We far too often underestimate the role of feet in body language. Usually it's upper part of the body that gets the most attention. But legs can say something important as well. Thus it would be an advantage to know some more ways for decoding body signals that others send to us.

       Feet have some resemblance with hands, just less developed and used more for walking connected movements. Although there are examples that people can train themselves to eat or play musical instruments using their feet. Ofcourse this is usually done in not so pleasant circustances when people basically are forsed to do so (being without arms).

       As well as hands, feet can be used as a pointer device. By pointing we show our preferences: what or who interests us or the place (direction) we want to go. So let say when a person is not interested in conversation, they can point on a way out.

      People can tap or stamp the feet.

      Stamping is mostly used for getting attention. It can be done on its own or to help emphasize the emotion expressed by other parts of the body. Often chidren use this way in their tantrums.

     Tapping foot is like subconscious clock ticking the moments of time. This is usually used when a person is in a hurry or impatient.

      Moving feet can help to deceive a liar, as the latter ones usually move their feet especially when sitting and having their legs under the table.

      A person who is anxious may shift from one foot to the other or walk when needed to stand (like a presenter or teacher).

      When a person is overwhelmed with some extreme emotions like pain or pleasute, they may curl their toes.

      Feet can be used as a weapon to attack or defend oneself. And practically the whole foot coverage is used for that (toes-which can be dangerous, sides, bottom, heel and top of the foot). Using feet in martial arts is very popular.

     Foot is one of the most massaged parts of the body. Reflexology uses massaging of the feet as a cure to a lot of illneses. There are points in a foot that are connected with organs of the body. By pressing them correctly a lot of deases can be cured.

     Stroking the foot can be a light form of erotic suggestive gesture.

For more information on nonververbal communication, please visit my site.

 Improving Communication in Business and Personal Life

Thigs have their own role in nonverbal communication. Their signals add on when interpreting body language.

People can make opening and closing gestures using thighs.

Opening gesture can be simply a running parallel to hips. In sexual body language this can mean invitation to getting closer. For men it has a meaning of significance ansd power. Women can underline this with a short skirt or dress.

Closing gesture means the opposite. This is mostly expressed by keeping knees together, especially when having a short skirt or dress and in sitting position.

Closing sighs goes even further with crossing them. Very strong signal is sent when arms and legs are crossed at the same time. When arms are not crossed, but legs are - this can indicate that the person tries to control body movements. But this can be also a relaxed position. In this case muscles look loose.

A big role plays touching the thighs. Touching thighs attracts attention to them and can be taken as a suggestive gesture. Touching the inside or at the top of the thighs is even more suggestive.

We may also place our hands on thighs in sitting position just before getting up showing readiness to stand up and go.

More on decoding body language visit my site Improving Communication in Business and Persona life