4 posts tagged “body language gestures”

     How often do you notice if the person is interested in conversation? Do they look at your eyes and keep the talk alive by adding their bit.

     Sometimes the conversation doesn't go the flow we want. If the person is not interested in what you are saying it's difficult especially when you are trying to make a sale. They won't buy unless you want to bore them to open their wallet. Some sales people use this way of persuading for purchase. It's really annoing.

    Maybe it's just better to leave the talk for another time. What if person is just tired and all that's occupies their mind is just to have some rest? Talking later about the same issue might bring better results. Or what if person is not interested at all...then why should you waist their and your time. If you still want  to persist then changing an  approach might make sense.

    What are the signs of bored body language? Some of them are very obvious...

    Eye contact, actually its absence is one of the main signals of boredom in non verbal communication. A person would look anywhere but your eyes. It would look like everything around is pretty much intertaining like door, their watch or clock on a wall, other people, they might be deciding whether they need manicure done etc. 

    They may also tap their fingers or swing their feet showing off their unpatience and readiness to switch their mind for something else.

    Their body may sag and they'd look for something to suppost them like leaning against the wall or slouch down in the seat etc. They may also yawn quite often (openly or trying to control).

    They would probably use some closed body language gestures as well. You can read my previous post for those.

Want to know more on body language? Then visit Improving Communication in Business and Personal Life

    What are open body language gestures? What do they mean? 

    People use open gestures when they feel relaxed and secure, when they trust the person they are talking with and agree with what's being said.

    The start of the whole idea of openness is in no way having crossed legs or arms. Even if we cross our legs or arms or worth still both just because we feel relaxed in that position it sends the signal of being closed. Thus the other person could feel less open as well. 

    Another thing to remeber that during talk person can change position from closed to opened. Attentive observer can notice those swifts and thus see changes in thinking and feelings.

    Open arm gestures involve free moving mostly synchronical. Arms take a big part in supporting what the person is saying. Palms are the most expressive in this case by "forming" detailed shapes and "holding" things. In open gestures arms are usually held wide open with palms mostly up. This shows that the person has nothing to hide and is trustworthy.

     Open legs means not crossed. In most cases that is keeping them parallel or slighty stretched apart.

     I was mentioning in one of my previous posts that legs, especially feets can be subtle pointers to show what or who person prefers. If feet are pointing at the other person during conversation this is probably a sign that they like them and enjoy the talk. Some other gestures should show the interest.

     Sometimes you may see a mixed message like arms are opened and legs are crossed. This simply can mean that the person is feeling comfortable in this position. Another meaning though could be that they try to control their body expressions. So you need to be careful. Other gestures should suppost or dispel your suspition.

    Open gestures occur when the person is interested in the talk and is actively involved in it. So usually this means a head directed solely towards the other person and a prolonged eye contact.

    In overall person feels relaxed and at ease and sometimes you may also notice that person tries to loosen their clothes as well (like unbuttoning or even removing jacket or coat etc).

  More tips on body language you can find on my site .

 Please visit Improving Communication In Business, at Work and Personal Life

Today we'll continue with some finger body language gestures. I will mention some rude gestures as well as they play a big role in nowadays' nonverbal communication.

I'll start with the thumb. We use it up or down. Thumb-up means agreement and approval. Thumb-down the opposite. Sideways usually waggled means uncertainty. Thumb up or down has a long history. These were used even in Roman times. These gestures were decisive whether gladiator should stay alive or be killed.

When somebody has his hands in the pockets and thumbs are sticking out of pockets usually this is a sign of confidence and control. So that can indicate authority.

Checking up nails usually means boredom as well as fidgeting fingers can also mean boredom or tense. 

Biting nails can mean uncertainty or nervousness.

Fluttering fingers may indicate fear or uncertainty.

Fingers grossed are the hope for luck (national lottery in UK).

Now a bit of rude body language. A lot of it was new to me. But knowing some gestures won't lead to misunderstandings. Some of them are cross-cultural.

 The most popular in western countries is the finger gesture, made by extending the middle finger and bending the others. It has quite a few names. One of the known variations is extending thumb as well. Using both hands for the finger gesture means 'dirty double'. If somebody shows back of the hand with extended three middle fingers this says 'read between the lines'.

The finger gesture ( 'up yours') symbolizes penis and has a long history and actually disputive origin. It's mentioned in some Antient Roman and Antient Greek writings and this gesture was ment to insult the other person. Actualy it is believed that the spread of this gesture has connection to the geographical influence of both Roman Empire and Greco Roman civilization.

Another variation of the origin dates to the first century of Mediterranean world where it was used to divert the threat of evil eye.

This gesture has a lot of variations. Italians use bent elbow to insult the other person.

Another very common variation is V gesture. It is commonly spread in UK (true), Ireland, Australia, New Zealand and India. I actually didn't know about such gesture when I just came to England. Once I was ordering two drinks in a bar. As the music was quite loud I had to use finger body language to help me. And I think you guessed what happened... Yes I was ordering two drinks using V gesture. Thankfuly everything end up in a friendly way. Since that time I use the reverse palm - facing the other person if I need something double. Actually this latter gesture means peace in non verbal communication.

Some other variations. Showing little finger indicates small penis. The index and little fingers pointing upwards says that the man is cuckold or it may also mean 'evil eye' 

Now some cross cultural meanings. In Iraq and some other middle eastern countries the 'thumb up' gesture means the same as western 'the finger' gesture. Although they say in Iraq these gestures were adopted to the western patern.

Some African and Carrebian countries use all five fingers with palm facing forward to call someone a bastard (literally saying 'you have five fathers').

In some areas in Sri Lanka they use index finger for the same as middle finger in western countries.

In Egypt they pull the middle finger inside the palm. This gesture considers very vulgar. 

To read nore on body language, please visit my site Improving Communication in Business and Personal Life

sources:www.wikipedia.org,www.changingminds.org 

I believe those of us,who visited Las Vegas are impressed and have fresh knowledge and motivation to move their busineses onto next level.We,who couldn't make it, were doing everything to keep all our blogs busy.And I hope today we'll begin to work as a whole team again.

By now, everyone knows how important nonverbal communication is during conversation with others.It grabs 55% of attention.Some body language experts believe this number gets up to 75%.Wow...

We need to think what we send out to the world while dealing with others! Ofcourse,great looking as well as words themselves are important.But we should really start to pay more attention to our posture and gestures in different situations.We need to learn how our body "behaves" when meeting different people.What emotions bring out this or that gesture.How intentionnaly send such body language signs that would bring the results we want.

Today I want to give you some general information and within next couple of days I'll explain everything in more details.

I was surprised to know,that practically every part of our body can express our feelings and emotions.I mean it.Our hair,forehead,ears,eyebrows,eyes,nose,cheeks,lips,teeth,tongue,chin...And that's just face.Moving all along the body:neck and shoulders,chest and back,our bellies,bottom and hips.Arms and legs are not behind either:upper arms,elbows,hands and fingers;thighs,knees and feet.

Seems like half of anatomy.

All the above parts of body either make us winners or not.Their mixed combinations show to others whether we are attentive listeners,relaxed,confident,bored,aggresive,dominant,defencive,romantic etc.So why not to benefit by knowing the meanings of those expressions?Decoding all the signs of body language might be really usefull.

In the next posts,as I've already mentioned,I'll give more information on all those topics.

Stay tuned.

Reading and Decoding Body Language